Day 48 - I am gonna fight for my 399 lbs

I have decided to take that plateau out! I went to the gym this morning before work. This is very unlike me, so I must be serious. The gym manager was very surprised to see me. I did 33 minutes on the treadmill burning 327 calories and traveled 1.27 virtual miles! Now I must shower and get to work.

I have decided to change my calorie limits. I have been reading a lot about weight loss and much of my research tells me that eating so few calories may cause me to lose weight slower. I am going to raise my calories a little and monitor my weight loss to see if it changes. I think this process is about more than just self control. I think it is about learning how the body works and how we can take advantage of that knowledge.

Below are calculations that give examples of what experts say I should be eating per day.

Maintenance: 4143 Calories/day
Fat Loss: 3314 Calories/day

Extreme Fat Loss: 3216 Calories/day

I am going to keep it between 1600 & 2000 because I do not want to tempt myself with 3000 calories a day. It is a slippery slope and I have to maintain disipline.

I welcome your thoughts and opinions. Assuming I am not talking to myself :-)


Sean

Day 47 - Weird Plateau

So I went to the gym again today and I did 33 Minutes on the treadmill burning 322 calories and traveling 1.25 miles. I ate a little more than usual coming in at 1722 calories for the day. I have decided that I can add what I burn at the gym to my food budget if I am hungry. 1600 calories is a very low budget for a 400lb guy and 1600 hundred while working out can be a little crazy. I have also decided the gym will be a great way to earn a snack if i want something extra a will have to work for it. I don't intend to eat back every calorie I burn. That would defeat the purpose.

I am at the weird plateau. I have been between 405 and 402 for a week. It seems like I can break over into the 300s. I know that Nothing I am doing is stopping my weight loss. Even if I was being dishonest with myself there is no way I could cheat enough to go over the 3000 calories I would need to stop my progress. I am not cheating myself by the way. I have made a few adjustments here and there but I have remained honest with both myself and you about every move I have made. If I start lying, this thing is over. I don't want it to be over. I feel real change and I look forward to it. I just need to get through this damn plateau!

Sean

Day 46 - First gym day.

Last Year I was going to the gym and I had hired a trainer and I was working out hard. I didn't lose weight nearly as quick as I have been losing it this time because I was not eating right. When I started at the gym in March 2009 I weighed 450lbs and when I left them in Winter of 2009 I weighed 417lbs. That is compared to the last 46 days where I have gone from 445lbs to 402lbs with no exercise. I can't wait to feel the results of working our and eating right together.

First day back to the gym and I took it kind of easy. I did 15 minutes on the treadmill and burned 132 calories for a total distance of 1/2 a mile. Then I decided to flat bench press 30lb dumbbells for 15 reps. I managed a set and a half (I know, that's sad). I then pressed 22.5lb dumbbells on the incline for one set of 15. I finished of with 10 minutes on the stationary bike for a distance of 3.75 miles and only 62 calories burned. I burned a total of 301 calories for the trip. Not too bad for the first day.

I like the way the gym makes me feel and I look forward to getting stronger and faster as the days come.

Until tomorrow!

Sean

Day 45 - Really Hungry and Back to the Gym!

Hello folks. I am still fighting incredible hunger pains. I have been fighting them for 4 days now, but I am winning. I have flirted with the idea of raising my calorie values because realistically I have some wiggle room and I could easily eat 2000 calories a day and lose weight at the same level I am losing it now. I have also been reading about calorie cycling. Calorie cycling is where you vary the amount of calories eaten through out the week to trick your metabolism into losing more fat instead of lean muscle. I have decided to just stick with the 1600 calories for now, because I don't want to make any change in the midst of struggle because that would feel like failure and failure is a spiral.

I picked up my membership card from the gym today. I joined a gym a couple months back and they just opened. I am planning to get in there tomorrow and do some cardio and some strength training. I will post my results tomorrow.

Sean

Day 44 - Weigh Day Number 3

Today's weight 402. That is a loss of 43lbs total. I thought I would hit the 399 mark, but there was some weird fluctuation in weight. I am still very happy with my results and I will surely be below 400lbs at my next weigh in.

Over all I am feeling pretty successful and I do not think the 1800 calorie incident is that big a deal. The only way that becomes a big deal is if I let it become a big deal.

Today is a day for reflective celebration. So that is what I am gonna do.

Thanks for reading.

Sean

Another thing I want to do when I am not fat: I want to wear Under Armour T-Shirts.

Day 43 - Have I failed?

Yesterday was my first really difficult day. And I am afraid I failed on principle. As I mentioned in yesterdays post, I was really hungry all day. I ended up eating over 1800 calories. In reality that's not a failure at all. At my size my recommended calorie intake for steady weight loss is over 4000 calories. So technically I did not hurt my weight loss at all. However. I have a self imposed goal of 1600 calories. I went over that goal willingly because I was hungry.

This is the slippery slope that I think catches many people who are trying to change their lifestyles. One slip and you feel like all is lost and revert right into old habits. I am choosing not to revert I am choosing to view this as a process. I have to admit to myself that their may be some days when I need a little more food.

I will be thinking about this for the next few days as I try to figure out a concrete plan for dealing with this. I need to have a way of figuring this kind of incident into my plan so it does not feel like a failure and cause me to question my commitment.

Have you had minor setbacks that have or almost have pushed you over the edge? Tell me about them.

Sean

Days 41 & 42 - Frustration!!

Yesterday was pretty uneventful. It was my day off. I ate a big sub and watched TV all day. Nothing to report.
This morning I stepped on the scale and it was a few pounds more than the last time I looked. This happens sometimes and it usually rolls back pretty quickly, but it is still frustrating. It is a mental thing. If you can't roll with this kind of thing I recommend you pick a weigh day and stay away from scales until then. I can handle it and I like the daily reminder of my progress so I risk the occasional "bad scale day". I am also real hungry lately. I am usually not too hungry and that makes eating much less easy, but the last couple days I have missed food. No one said this would be easy and no one was wrong this is not easy at all.


I remember why I am here and I will get through this.

Until next time

Sean

Day 40 - Bad start, but determined!

Today I realized I didn't have anything healthy for breakfast at home. It is important that I never miss breakfast because it is good to try and avoid being hungry. When I am hungry I make bad food choices. Today I had a sausage McMuffin with egg and a hash brown from McDonald's, clocking in at 600 calories. That is a lot. I usually try not to go over 400. I will rein it in for the rest of the day and make sure I hit my goal. The weight is still coming off and I am confident that I will hit the 399 mark before my weigh day on Friday. I will be so excited to not have to say I weigh 400lbs any more. If I can get down to 350 I will finally match the number of pounds on my drivers license! Yeah we all lie.

My new goal after hitting 399 is going to be 345. That will put me at my first 100lbs lost and I hope to hit this by Christmas

I am feeling strong!

Sean

Days 38 & 39 - Must be going good!

I forgot to post yesterday and I chalk that up as a good thing. If I don't need to post that means I am not spending a lot of time thinking about my eating or my weight loss.

I am still losing weight quite quickly and that is awesome. I hope to post a weight of under 400lbs this Friday. I still can't loose it fast enough. I want to be small now. I want to mountain biking and roller coaster riding. I want to run and feel this endorphin rush I am always hearing about. Someday my friends someday. At least now I have a general idea when someday might be. Unlike the past when a sat around wishing that someday would just occur. I used to think the only way I would lose weight would be if they locked me up somewhere and controlled my food intake and made me exercise. Of course, that would be a miserable way to lose weight and it is totally unnecessary. You just have to take control of your own life and do what needs to be done. I feel like I am in training because I am. I am in training for the biggest of events. The event is My Life! If that does not keep me motivated nothing will.

Tomorrow is day 40 w00t! See you then.

Sean

Day 37 - Another fun filled day!

I made it another day. I am one week from my 3rd weigh in and I think I might break 400lbs. That will be an awesome milestone for me. I hoped to break 400 by weigh day number 4, but it looks like I may hit it earlier. I have a physical shortly after weigh day 4 and the last time I was at my doctors office the scale couldn't even weigh me. It taps out at 450lbs. It would be cool to be under 400. I always dread that scale. I walk in and get weighed and the doctor looks at my weight and kinda has a look on his face like your gonna die fat ass. He has never said that, but that is what my mind hears. I am also having blood work done because he was concerned I could be pre-diabetic. Hopefully I started in time to dodge that bullet.

I have been more hungry today than usual and I think it is because I have made some poor food choices to indulge in some things I like. I will however live with those choices and stick to my calorie goals because I am not gonna be a fat guy anymore.

Some people have told me they can tell I am losing weight. Honestly, I don't know how they can tell at my size. My pants are a little looser, but I don't feel like I have changed in any fundamental way quite yet.

I'll be back tomorrow to share more of my story.

Sean

Day 36 - Fat Folks think about food.

I have been doing a little soul searching today trying to figure out why I don't think about my weight lose more. Almost everyday you have seen me struggle for words to fill my posts beyond the The day that I am on. I love typing in the number of the day that I am on because it means I am that much closer to success. I have decided that the reason I struggle for words is because I really don't focus on food like I used too. I used to think about all the things that I wanted to eat or where I could get the most food because I like lots of food! Now The only thought I give to my food is what I am gonna eat on a giving day and what the calories will add up to. I find that keeping myself busy and focusing on other things really helps. When I am out of calories for the day I don't think about food. I just watch a movie or read a book or play a computer game or do 1 of 100 other things that I enjoy until it is time to go to bed. On the rare occasion that I am having trouble dealing with my new way of eating I just take a nap.


Sean

Day 35 - Uneventful and that is a good thing.

Today was another day in the battle for weight loss. I must be built different than some of the other bloggers I have read. I have read about the soul searching and the daily struggles and I was prepared to write about my own struggles. Most of the time I am not struggling with this. I have a number I eat till I hit that number and I wait till the next day to do it again. Most of the time my mind and body are cool with that plan.

I do occasionally still want more food or have a craving I can't satisfy, but my thoughts of where I want to be a couple years from now quickly squash those thoughts.

If there is one thing to be learned from this journey it is the simplest weight loss plan of all. Eat less and lose weight. We all know that is the only formula that works and we spend years of our lives looking for ways to lose weight that don't involve eating less. That is not going to happen. Has anything good ever come into your life without some sort of sacrifice?

Eat less, Lose Weight


Sean

Day 34 - Today Happend

I had a post for today and I ended up deleting because It was negative and I was concerned how it might affect people who may read my blog for inspiration in their own journey. So if you read it. I apologize. If not just know that I am still on track and tomorrow is another day.

Sean

Day 33 - 1/3 of the weigh to 100 days!

Another successful day under my belt. Speaking of my belt, I am going to need a new one soon and some pants to go with it! Today was a test as someone rolled into my office with 8 fresh pizza's this afternoon. I did not touch a slice. I went to Wendy's and got a Spicy Chicken sandwich and a side of Mandarin oranges. I also had oatmeal, pork chops and a beef jerky today. Tonight while I watch TV I will eat my new favorite snack of light cream cheese and saltine crackers. I am really learning how to do this. I made some changes from when I started. I upped my calorie total from 1500 to 1600 hundred because that was more comfortable for me and because I knew the weight loss would still happen rather quickly at that number. A couple of times I made a mistake and went over a bit, but I didn't let that get me down and I have stuck to my guns.

That is the key to this thing. You have to know that your not perfect and you will make mistakes and that is OK. Do not throw yourself under the bus and give up on all of your hard work because things didn't go perfect that day. I remember when I would quit smoking ( I have done it a few times) and I would slip up and have a cigarette and then I would say screw it I failed  and then I would go buy a pack and let the smoking begin. You can't do that. One cigarette or in this case one Twinkie does not equal failure. it means your human and your weak and you need to get back up and fight. I have not had any blatant failures like this since this campaign has begun, but I have had them enough in the past to know where I have failed. My recent failure are usually due to a miscalculation or the calculated decision to eat a pickle because I am truly starving.

I know that if I keep doing what I am doing it is going to change my life forever.

Mañana

Sean

Day 32 - Still dropping weight and another good day!

It's not an official weight in but I check every morning and today I got a surprise of 408lbs. I seem to drop weight in spurts. I may check 3 or 4 days and it seems like I am holding steady and then all of a sudden I have a major loss. I have heard it said before and I would have to agree that facing the scale can be frustrating if you are easily disappointed. I know it is a process and I don't expect to see a great result every time I look. I do like to monitor it to see if I am stalling so that I can decide if I need to make a change to help myself along.

Today I made my calorie budget and I am feeling good about things though my appetite is still and issue and I have to fight it every step of the way. I think my new way of looking at food and the way I have changed my eating habits will allow me to whether an storms that I will face.

I can do this. I am doing this.

Till tomorrow

Sean

Day 31 - Busy Day with the Family!

Today Kati and I made a trip to the reptile show. We had been planning it for some time. One of my customers sells crested geckos there and she even wrote the book on them for the professional breeders series. I fell in love with the little guys and ended up purchasing one for my daughter that I will be taking care of him. He lives in my office now and I have to care for him and feed him crickets and worms. I got screwed on this deal :-) It is OK though because I love the little guy.

After purchasing the lizard and obtaining a free signed copy of the book (Thanks Robbie!). I decided what I needed to care for the little guy and we went shopping. When we obtained our supplies we went home and set-up his living quarters. He is a happy little gecko now.

Later we took Kati to Chuck E Cheese for what my wife and mother in law call her un-birthday that seems to occur 6 months after her actual birthday. OOOOK. So I ate 4 pieces of pizza and it was Delicious! I had the calories to burn because I had not eaten much today.

My wife and I got Nana to take Kati and we went to see "The Expendables" which was awesome for any guy who grew up in the 80's. My wife said after "not much of a plot." and I replied "who cares about the plot?" I loved it and I hope the make it a franchise!

Now we are home and it is a little after midnight. I have some calories left for some cheese and crackers and I am gonna watch some episodes of "Lost" on Netflix!

It was a good day!

P.S. I did not partake in any theater food, that stuff will kill ya!

Until tomorrow

Sean

Day 30 - Weigh Day 2 - Too Big to Fail!

So it is day 30 and I weighed in this morning. And the scale sez.................413 that is a loss of 32 lbs in 29 days. Not too bad at all. I am pretty happy and ready too see more or is that less in the future.

I am changing the name of this blog to "Too Big to Fail - Another Fat Guys Diary


Until Tomorrow

Sean

Day 29 - One day from weigh day number 2

Tomorrow is weigh day number 2 and I will get up in the morning and stand on my bathroom scale. Then I will step off of it and stand on it again. I will then step off and step on it a third time and stare at it in disbelief. I know the weight is coming off, but I won't believe it. My waist line is shrinking and my wife says that my face is starting to show weight loss, but i am still a really heavy guy and I don't think I will really start to believe this is happening until I have crossed the 100lb mark.

Tomorrow will be day 30 and I am confident that I will have lost 30lbs. That will be a pound a day and that is not bad at all. I will take that for as long as I can keep up that pace. I expect as the weight comes off the process will slow. I will be mentally ready for that.

Until the morning

Sean

Day 28 - Stayed on track

I don't know how all of you bloggers do it. I just don't feel up to writing everyday. I need to post to count the days, but some days I just don't know what to say. So um hey I made it another day! I am still on track and I am happy with my progess.


Sean

Day 27 - No burning desire to pig out today!

I have made it another day and I am eating right and feeling good about things. It's my day off so I got me a giant sub from Jersey Mike's. I ate half for brunch and I have half left for dinner. After that I will still have 430 Calories left for today! I also had a Cheryl & Co sugar cookie for a treat earlier. So today is good and I will make it fine!

I am watching "Lost" on Netflix. I have been watching it all day. It is pretty cool. I love that I can download and watch an entire television series at my leisure. Technology is so awesome!

Until tomorrow!

Sean

Day 26 - and I want to eat a giant pizza!

Yup, you heard me. When your eating so few calories there are good days and there are bad days. Today is a bad day. I want to eat until I explode.....However, I am not going to. I am gonna go take a nap instead.

Here's to day 27!

Sean

Giovanni's is my favorite. I drive 120 miles round trip for this pizza! ( by the way this is a stock internet photo. I would not dare get close enough to one of these to photograph it.)

Update! Turns out a slice of 12" Giovanni's pepperoni pizza is only 142 calories a slice. I am so having some of this the next time I go back home!

Day 25 - Oh no!

So today I went over my calories by 10 calories. I can freak out and go "oh no! What have I done?" or I can shrug my shoulders and realize that might happen sometimes. I choose to shrug. 10 extra calories is not a set back at all and will have no effect on my plans. I choose to be upbeat about this. This is about changing my eating habits and I have and I am changing my habits. So today is still another mark in the win column.

We are getting close to the second weigh day and I am excited and apprehensive. I don't expect dramatic results like the first weigh day, but every pound counts.  I am kind of a cheater. I weigh myself every day, but I choose to only officially weigh in for this blog every two weeks. So I always have idea how things are going.  Any way we have another day in the books and we are approaching the end of the first month.

Till next time friends

Sean

Day 24 - Not much to say.

Not much to say today. I made it another day and I am hopeful. I did have an incident while teaching a class where I forgot what I was talking about a couple of time because my mind just went blank. I must remember to spread out my food and eat at regular intervals.

-More to come

Sean

Day 23 - In a groove - Fear the chicken!

I made it to day 23. It almost seems silly to say I made it. After eating like this for 23 days I am not sure I could go back to pigging out like I used to.

 I know dangers are still out there. It does not take much pizza or fried chicken to push the calories over the edge. I can't believe I am going to say this because I roll my eyes everytime I read it at the end of every blog post , but Sean Anderson over at "http://losingweighteveryday.blogspot.com/" signs off every blog with "Good choices" (love ya man). He is right, it is all about making the good choices. Which is hard when KFC has a buy 8 pieces of chicken and get 8 pieces of chicken free deal. Do you know how long it would take me to eat 16 pieces of chicken on a 1600 calorie a day budget? I do! It would take me 5 days, That's if I only ate the chicken!

I am noticing changes in my body and it is infectious. I can't wait to find out who I am under all this weight. There is a guy under there I have never met and that's exciting.

Oh and another thing for the "Things Fat Guys Can't Do" list.
Lay in a hammock! I wanna sleep in a hammock in my back yard!


-Till Tomorrow

Sean

Day 22 - Hot Wings and Twinkies!

It is day 22 and I am still doing it! Today I had Hot wings from KFC and a pack of Twinkies that have been sitting on the kitchen counter all week. This is the most horrible diet ever. I don;t know how long I can last :-)

Seriously i am doing OK and everyday brings me one step closer to my goals. I am filling my time with work, video games and spending more time with my guitars. I have always had issues with how my guitar play. So I ordered some setup tools and some books and today I did my first neck reset on one of my guitars and I am methodically setting it up for my playing style. The I will move on to my other 5 electric guitars. This should keep me occupied for some time. The easiest way to keep on a strict calorie budget is to keep busy thinking about things that are not food related!

-Until tomorrow

Sean

Day 21- A list of things "Fat Guys" can't do.

Buy any car they want (have to buy the one you fit in)
Ride Roller Coasters
Walk around big events like fairs and downtown events
Sit in booths
Buy novelty t-shirts
Wear free novelty t-shirts
Buy belts in a regular store
Play guitar well (fat fingers)
Ride in flight simulators at Arcades and Flight museums
Look cool doing something athletic
Buy comfortable jeans
Buy any kind of shoes you want.
Sit next to someone in a movie theater ( I can, but I would rather not)
Sleep without a machine
Sit on furniture without breaking it or wearing it out.

These are just a few things off the top of my head that I can't do because I am too fat. I write this things to remind myself why I am doing this.

What can't you do?

Sean

Day 20 - And the losing continues

So I made it through day 20 and I am still in this thing. I wish I had something exciting to say everyday like some of the other bloggers, but for the most part I am just happy to keep myself on track. The hardest part of dealing with all this is the self doubt. How many times have I started doing something positive for myself only to give up and revert into the same old behavior? It has been a bunch. Right now that first 50 lbs is what is driving me. I hope I can keep finding that same drive as I hit my first goal and head for a second and a third etc.

Right now let's just celebrate day 20 and look forward to the next 20 days!


Sean

Day 19 - Already!

I can't believe I am at day 19 already. Today I made a big omelet for breakfast. One carton of egg beaters, chopped onion, two slices of sharp cheddar and 6 slices of honey ham. It clocked in at 398 Calories. This thing was huge and I feel like I am gonna bust wide open! It is amazing what you can eat if you pay a little attention to what your doing. Sometimes I am a little hungry, but for the most part I am doing just fine. The hardest part of the day is the evenings when I used to sit in front of the TV and snack all night. Now I just grab a pickle and I am good. I am doing this thing and I am ahead of schedule to lose 50lbs by September 20th. I picked that day because I am having a fulll physical on that day and I would like it if my blood work didn't suck.

Anyway it is still morning my work day is just starting and I don't have much more to offer than my breakfast menu and optimism.

-Next time

Sean

Day 18 - The Dog Swim

Still going strong here. Had about 800 calories so far and I am saving the rest for a couple grilled burgers tonight!

We went swimming at the pool with our dog Eli. She is a 75lb Lab. Eli, Kati (my daughter) and Myself ended up swimming in the pool. I haven't been in a pool for years, because who wants to see the fat guy in the pool. Losing weight and knowing that I am rapidly changing has giving me a new found confidence and I really don't care how I look in the pool, because the next time I hit the pool I will look like a totally different person.

After the pool we came home and showered and played in my office for a bit. I took some pictures of my daughter Kati with one of my guitars. She is so damn cute!

Kati Rocks!!

-Until Tomorrow

Sean